Major Overhaul 101

My daughter and her husband are moving in with me for a short time. This has kind of set me back. Even though I prayed about it and truly feel it is the right decision, it has me feeling that this going to take more of an attitude adjustment on my part.

My son in law can be quite draining, he is so negative because he was raised that way and now that he is moving forward in a more positive way, he has become extreme in his joy. Either way it is draining on me physically, mentally and spiritually. He can be quite obnoxious no matter what he is feeling. I kept thinking that lady there is something wrong with you. You don’t like it when he is negative and now you are complaining when he isn’t. He can’t win with you.

A lot of it has to do with my health. My back has gotten to the point that it is affecting other parts of my body such as my feet and my hands. My hands are barely useful. I am getting to where I struggle to grasp things. Even to blog takes a lot of effort. I have constant tingling in my hands

My feet swell so much now that they ache and feel so tight, I know it is from sitting but it hurts to stand and sometimes even taking a single step can result in a lot of pain which radiates up my entire spine into my neck and down my sciatica.

There are a lot of things that is going to take physical strength now as I prepare to have them move in. I am willing to do it, although I don’t know how.

I realized this morning I need to do what I can to find a doctor who won’t pull out his prescription pad and try to stuff me with meds like what I had before. I need a doctor who will listen and respect my wishes. I need one whose main focus will be to get my back fixed. I question if it is even possible. So far it has not been my experience, but at the rate I am going I will be in assisted living. I won’t thrive in such a place, I would be giving up too much of my independance.

If I had to have someone take care of me I am afraid I would lose all hope and be just living to die.

So this day I began another fast to pray for guidance, to even have my back healed without going to a doctor, but I will wait on the Lord. I know I will receive inspiration.

Even though I have nothing to really add that might be thought or spiritual provoking, this is a blog that states my ship has pulled into the dry dock awaiting a major overhaul. Hopefully not too long but time will tell.