Yesterday I was spiritually drained all day and no words for a real blog came. The beginnings of a few were written down but as I began to post them, I stumbled trying get my words out. I realized I was just trying to fill my own personal quota. My words and blogs were like before the earth was created, without form or void. So I stopped and closed out my app.
Normally I become a little more concerned when I stop feeling the spiritual prompting to write. I usually begin and end my blogs with tears which is Gods’ way of giving His stamp of approval.
As the day became the evening I turned on some meditation music as it has become part of my daily routine. Still receiving no inspiration, I sat in my recliner and prayed silently for promptings but again nothing came. As is usually the case, Satan began his needlings. He whispered, He isn’t here, and you might as well realize that what you have been feeling have been nothing more than the rantings of someone who is having a bi-polar moment. I turned on Youtube videos of young Lds women singing hoping to chase Satan away but he is like the burrs you pick up in the desert, he clung on and continued his assault.
I listened to the beautiful voices and Satan began again. Listen to those girls, aren’t their voices beautiful? You really aren’t as special as you think you are. They have so much talent, remember when you could sing? Now you can hardly carry a tune. I began to feel less than what I felt I had been. I went to bed and prayed like I normally do and prepared to sleep and I drifted off to sleep.
This morning when I woke up, I was well rested and my mind was clear. Once when I was awake enough images of a scenario began to play out in my mind. Tears began to wet my pillow.
I will try to find the words to convey what I saw.
A woman sat in her frontroom ready to eat dinner with her grown children. All was present except for 1 adult daughter that lived in Kansas. I have been asked to give a talk this Sunday on whatever topic I choose. Of course you are all invited if you would like to come. It got silent and the mother saw the usual eye glancing at each other as each tried to think of a reason for not making it. The mother knew that they wouldn’t show up and it really was ok. Her youngest daughter who was active in the church reassured her that her and her husband would be there. She smiled at her and said that would be great and it was ok if the rest couldn’t come but she just wanted to extend the invitation.
The mother prepared her talk and felt good about it so that when she stood before the congregation they might understand.
Sunday came and as was promised, her youngest daughter and husband showed up. When it was time to go up on stage and stand at the podium, her daughter held her mothers arm while she walked up. Her hands shook as she stood at the microphone. The daughter stood next to her to give her mothers frail body some much needed support.
The mother laid the one page down in front of her and began to give her talk, she glanced up into the congreagation and before one word had been uttered. Each child reverantly began to enter and sit down in last rows of pews. Tears filled the womans eyes and began to fall on the paper that had held the words of a well prepared talk, When it seemed all her children were present, she glanced down but the ink that had been printed been out had run together. The mothers tears continued to fall and she glanced up again and the one the final child from Kansas entered the chapel and sat down next to her siblings. The tears turned to sobs and no words could even begin to be spoken.
Her young daughter whispered into her ear. We are all here for you momma.
No talk was given that day, but everyone knew and understood just the same. No words needed to be spoken, a promise fulfilled from her Patriarchal blessing that “All the righteous desires of your heart shall be fullfilled” had just been realized.
I seal and close this story now with my tears.